A look at "Gray Gays" & the Elderly LGBT Community ~

"Gray Gays"



I came across another brief, but compelling documentary. It really does a great job exposing the struggles faced by gay elders in the aging progress in all facets of their lives.

The first thing the documentary does is exposes and dispels the myth that gays are all "young, carefree and wild". The idea, as presented in the documentary, is that as gays begin to age they seem to disappear. This completely contradicts the facts, however, that their are 1.5 million gay elders in America.

One elder who was interviewed on the video, Cedric Burgess, Age 57 says, "I am 57 years old, gay, black and proud." Burgess says that as you begin to age as a person in the LGBT community life can become isolated. There is not much social life because when you get older "nobody wants you." Burgess is HIV positive and his partner died of AIDS ten years ago. He frequently finds himself trying to go to bars, but when he goes he feels out of place and alone. Sometimes people will even stare and snicker because of the societal expectation that all social life for the LGBT community occurs during youth.

But he refuses to give into this society-pushed isolation. He has birds that give him constant company and is also regularly in touch with his friends and family. He keeps his mind occupied with volunteer work and reaching out to his community. The problem is that some people are not as fortunate as Burgess to have a supportive family or friend base and can find themselves completely isolated as they age.

But isolation is just one of the many special challenges that LGBT elders face. One woman in the video comments, "Until people realize older LGBT folks are out there, it is hard for the community to get the broader population to care about the issue."

The thing is that LGBT elders face what has been termed a "double invisibility." First they are invisible for being elderly and second for being members of the LGBT community. This doubled invisibility coupled with the homophobia/heterosexism of society can create an entire "generational invisibility".

Even though there are services for LGBT elders available, the service providers don't know how to reach the community because many of the members do not reach out for help, and just accept their isolation.

But not everyone is this passive. One man aged 60 says that he expects to be a full AARP members and demands to be treated respectfully.

Right now the LGBT elder community faces an internal struggle for recognition within the LGBT community and an external struggle to be recognized by the rest of America.